‘n Romantiese storie…

romantic

I remember having a conversation with a friend of mine who had been married to a wonderful Christian man for five years. “I don’t know if my standards are too high,” I told her. “I am so confused. I have all these desires for a certain type of man, but I haven’t even seen one guy who fits what I’m long­ing for in a husband!” ……

“Leslie, what are the main qualities you’ve always wanted in a man?” she asked.

I thought for a moment, then whipped out my mental checklist that I’d tucked away in a comer of my mind, adding to it over the years. “Well, I want someone who treats me like a princess, someone who is sensitive, tender, gentle, brave, full of integrity, servant hearted, and honorable just to name a few” Then I laughed self-consciously “I guess I’m holding out for Prince Charming,” I said sheepishly

“Not really,” she replied. “Just think about all those quali­ties you mentioned. Who can you think of that is the perfect example of all those character traits?”

“Uh … Superman?” I guessed. (Well, Clark Kent is sort of a Ken look-alike!)

“No. Jesus Christ,” she responded, eyes shining. “You see, Leslie, those desires for that kind of a man have been in your heart from a young age. But you are not the one who came up with those longings. It was God who put them in your heart, because He wants you to look for a man with the char­acter of Jesus Christ.”

Wowl What a truth! God had given me the desire for a godly, Christlike man because that’s exactly the type of man He wanted to bring me! It wasn’t that I was supposed to hold out for a man who never made mistakes and was absolutely perfect in every way Maybe my childhood imaginations had been a bit larger than life. But in no way did God want me to settle for one of the typical “jerks” who were a dime a dozen. He wanted me to save myself for a man who had His very nature and character within him. And He wanted me to trust Him enough to bring that special man to me in His perfect time.

Guess what? In His perfect time, thats exactly what He did. Eric is my gorgeous and gallant knight in shining armor. I am so glad I didn’t settle for second best.

Too many women become desperate. They are hungry for attention and affection, so they settle for guys who don’t know the first thing about how to treat a woman. They are impatient – they don’t trust that God could have something better for them… -uit die boek “When God writes your love story” deur Leslie en Eric Ludy.

Leslie en Erik is ‘n egpaar wat, voor hulle nog mekaar ontmoet het, albei afsonderlik besluit het dat hulle nie ‘n verhouding sal aanknoop sonder om te weet dis met die huweliksmaat wat God hulle gee nie. Nie bloot “geen voorhuwelikse seks nie” maar geen “dating” nie(!).
Volgens When God writes your love story stel God intens belang in jou verhoudings. Hy wil jou die regte soort mens maak wat ‘n gelukkige huwelik kan hê. Hy wil vir jou die soort huweliksmaat gee wat getrou aan jou kan wees en jou kan liefhê. Maar dan moet jy getrou bly aan daardie maat, selfs voor jy hom/haar ontmoet. Nie net fisies getrou nie, maar selfs emosioneel getrou.

Matt is finally married! After more than three decades … married! Whew! Some guys never marry because they don’t want to make a commitment. Then there are those who never “settle down” due to the fact that their breath could knock over a Saint Bernard.

After thirty-two years of singleness, Matt knew it wasn’t due to halitosis and it certainly wasn’t caused by his inability to commit. You see, Matt’s reason for being single had everything to do with a presence of commitment. He was committed to a woman whom he had never met. And until she came along, he was going to wait and wait and wait!

I get tingles when I hear a really good romantic love story And I got tingles when Matt shared his with me.

My favorite part was right after they had committed to each other to get married and Lisa gazed deeply into his eyes and asked, “Matthew, will you be faithful to me?”

“Baby doll,” Matt tenderly answered, “I have been faithful to you for thirty-two years!”

Wow! In one moment, because of the commitment he had made in the past, Matt gave his beautiful bride total confidence in the future. Men, your future wife wants to feel that same strength and confidence from YOU … and you have the power to give it to her. -ook uit die boek “When God writes your love story” deur Leslie en Eric Ludik.

Iewers in my het ek ‘n deeltjie hiervan geweet! Ek het as jong vrou gewoonlik ‘n vriendin of twee tussen tien en veertien gehad het wat net so nou en dan ‘n ekstra oor om te luister nodig gehad het. (God gee my nie meer sulke vriendinne nie, want ek leef nie tans na genoeg aan Hom om te weet wat om vir hulle te vertel nie.)

Ek hoor nog myself vir hulle vertel: “Jy is spesiaal en belangrik vir God, of jy nou ‘n boyfriend kry of nie. Moet nooit dink jy is minder spesiaal wanneer jy nie ‘n outjie in jou lewe het nie! Onhou hoe lief God jou het, meer as wat enige seun jou ooit kan liefhê.” Ek het amper nooit direk gepraat oor reinheid of maagdelikheid nie. Ek het ‘n grondslag probeer lê wat ‘n rede kan wees vir reinheid. Of vir ‘n heel hart. Of vir die selfvertroue om doelwitte na te streef. Of vir ‘n suksesvolle verhouding eendag waarin sy nie iemand soek om al die krake in haar hart te Polyfilla (terwyl die man in haar lewe te veel van sy eie krake het om hare heel te maak, en hoop dat sy syne sal Polyfilla) nie, maar ‘n verhouding tussen heel mense. Daar is sekerlik mense nodig om ‘n soortgelyke grondslag by seuns te lê, maar ek is nie die persoon daarvoor nie.

Ek onthou ook nog ‘n geprek met ‘n kollega, so bietjie minder as ‘n dekade gelede: Sy het haar verbasing genoem dat ek nog ‘n maagd is – in my middel 20’s. Ek vertel haar dat ek een wil bly tot God my die regte man gee. En dat ek nie met sommer enige man wil trou nie, maar ene wat God liefhet soos ek. “Jy gaan teleurgestel word,” was haar kommentaar.”

Dis seker nie onmoontlik dat ek teleurgestel kan word in my verwagting nie. Ek is al 9 jaar ouer as daardie dag, en het nog steeds nie daardie man ontmoet nie. Maar net oor ek nie ‘n regte man kan kry nie, is geen rede om te val vir ‘n verkeerde een nie. Ek het immers ‘n liefde wat groter is as wat enige man het om te gee. En eendag sal ek deel van Christus se bruid wees. (As jy ‘n Christen-man is wat die idee om deel van God se bruid te wees sissie-agtig vind, in die hemel sal dit nie wees nie!)

Intussen kan ek werk aan die karakter van Christus in my lewe -Sy liefde, Sy reinheid, Sy skoonheid. Dan sal ek ‘n goeie huweliksmaat kan wees. (Vir ‘n man. Of by die wederkoms.) En dis juis wanneer ek die minste werk aan my belangrikste verhouding, en dus die minste soos Jesus is en die minste geskik is om ‘n trouvrou vir ‘n toegewyde gelowige man te wees, wat ek die meeste na ‘n man in my lewe hunker.

Eerlik nou, vra jy dalk, verwag ek regtig om op my ouderdom ‘n man te vind wat nog nooit seks gehad het met ‘n vrou nie? Eerlike antwoord: Nee. Ek verwag wel ‘n man – as ek hoegenaamd man vat – wat streef om die gesindheid van Jesus te hê. Ene wat dalk al foute gemaak het langs die pad, maar wat saam met die Here al meer daaraan werk om Sy liefde en Sy krag te wys.

Besprekingsvrae: Hoe realisties is dit om uit te hou vir “die man wat God jou wil gee?” Watter soort vrou is mans regtig na op soek, en hoe belangrik is dit vir ‘n gelowige man as hy hoor dat ‘n vrou wat haarself nie net fisies rein nie, maar ook emosioneel rein gehou het vir hom? Hoe sterk voel gelowige mans/ vroue daaroor om Jesus te na-aap? En is dit onnosel van ‘n blogger wat wat onder haar eie naam blog, om soveel oor haarself bekend te maak as wat ek hier doen? (Asseblief: As jy hier kommentaar lewer, en jy het nie ‘n gebruikersnaam wat jou geslag vanselfsprekend wys nie, noem vir ons of jy ‘n dogtertjie of seuntjie is.)

2 responses to “‘n Romantiese storie…

  1. Danie Kritzinger

    Het jy al jou maat gekry?

  2. Dankie, Danie, ek gaan nou – vir die 1ste keer in my lewe – met ‘n man uit.

    (Ander onderwerp: As ek nou oor daai boek waaruit ek hier aanhaal moes skryf, sou dit minder positief wees. Ek besef nou dat dit uit ‘n kultus kom wat baie snaakse goed glo oor bv. ouerbeheer in verhoudings. Maar dis iets anders.)

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